Meet Cole R. Johnson, DMD
Born & Raised In Salem
Dr. Cole Johnson was born and raised in good ol’ Salem, Oregon. He attended Sumpter Elementary, Judson Middle School with his former best friend Kevin Ling, then graduated from Sprague High School winning the “1999 Mr. Olympian” award (which, trust me, USED to be a huge deal), then went on to do other less-public, less-embarrassing things.
Upon graduation, he attended a small Junior college in Idaho to play football. Still, he ended up with a scholarship on the track team after the football coaches saw how his quick feet, sure hands, and slightly effeminate build crumpled under the weight of your garden-variety Tongan linebacker.
Education
In 2005, Dr. Johnson graduated summa cum laude (Latin for ‘way smarter than those other show-offs, especially Kevin Ling’) with a degree in Biochemistry from Brigham Young University-Idaho.
He was also given the University’s highest honor, BYU-Idaho’s “Man of the Year” Award, for his leadership and academic and community involvement. It sounds a little dumb to win that kind of pretentious award, but they threw in a Free Slurpee punchcard at the local Circle K, so he nobly accepted it.
Dr. Johnson received his dental training from Oregon Health & Science University. There, his academic excellence was recognized, and he received a butt-load of super awesome accolades.
He served as President of the OHSU Student Research Group, was voted OHSU Student Mentor of the year, and founded the University’s first Spanish-speaking dental and medical students association.
Dr. J also received the “Outstanding Oral Biology Student Award,” graduating at the top of his dental class with High Honors.
Again, pretty snobby stuff, but it’s important that you know about all this stuff before you meet him, so you’ll give him a chance even if he trips, or his fly is down, or he accidentally refers to your first-born little princess as your grandson.
Expert Training
Anyway, after receiving his dental degree from Oregon Health & Science University, he was selected to attend the prestigious Virginia Commonwealth University for his Orthodontic residency.
There he received two additional years of specialized post-graduate training in Orthodontics and Maxillofacial Orthopedics.
Besides conventional braces, Dr. J also has training in cleft-lip/palate patients, habit appliances, and Invisalign.
And as a chronic overachiever, he also earned a master’s degree in oral biology along the way. Take that, Kevin Ling.
Treating Your Kids Like His
Dr. Cole has a teeny-tiny version of a life outside of his work at Johnson Family Orthodontics.
He’s got eight of the sweetest kids ever and the world’s most amazing wife—and high school sweetheart—Daisha.
Stupid Kevin Ling got dumped in 10th grade by Katie O’Connell (who wasn’t even very cute, by the way).
Anyway, nothing gives Dr. Johnson more joy than watching Psych with his oldest daughter, Macie; coaching his son Dominic’s football team; playing music with his girls Tessa, Claire, and Alice; going on walks to find bugs with his son lil’ Antonio; and baking mediocre batches of muffins with his daughter Charlotte, then taking these crappy muffins to neighbors that complain about his loud music, unkempt lawn and habit of checking the mail without pants on.
He desperately wanted ANOTHER boy, so his wife relented, and his youngest son Thurman was born. It’s not a big secret that this boy is the light of his life.
Baby Thurman is his most trusted sidekick and seldom leaves his Dad’s side unless he’s poopy.
In which case, Dr. J strategically places him next to the heater vent upwind of his wife so that she’ll smell him and change him forthwithly.
Dr. J enjoys playing guitar and singing in his 80s cover band, watching/playing football with his brothers, and staring creepily at his ridiculously cute wife, Daisha, while she does mundane tasks like folding laundry or plucking her eyebrows.
Anyway, Dr. Johnson’s family is his life, and his true happiness is his relationships with the many amazing members of the Salem community. He is insufferably happy.
It’s actually pretty irritating. Especially to the Lings…who are probably visiting Kevin in prison somewhere.